Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Can You Take The Pressure?

Have you ever looked at the sparkle of a diamond and thought about how it got it's shine? It is an amazing process...

About 100 miles below the earth's surface, carbon atoms are under immense pressure and heat in the mantle of this great terrestrial ball. The amount of pressure ( over 435,000 to over 725,000 pounds per square inch *) and the heat the carbon experiences ( 752 - 2192 degrees Fahrenheit *) are intense and overwhelming. But the process yields something of great beauty that remains hidden in the earth- often for millions of years until it is dug out, or is expelled by violent volcanic eruptions and brought to the surface.

Although we understand the numerical value of the heat and the pressure and the temporal value of the number of years that the gems stay hidden in the earth, our brains just can't wrap themselves around what that would actually be like. We think we have no relational or relevant experience to compare to the process of the creation of a diamond. But, in reality, we do.

Our lives are much like those carbon atoms.

In our daily existence as women, we organically undergo incredible pressures and forces. From the biological processes that are specific to us as women, to the relational pressures that we feel, to the weight of the world that we so often carry on our shoulders, who we are is continual metamorphosis impacted by the mass that life places upon us. Friction in the roles we play and the situations in life that we encounter create intense heat in addition to the impact of the of the pressure. We are compressed, warmed and refined - deep inside the mantle of our existence. Often we remain hidden until a force beyond ourselves uncovers the gem we have become - an external encounter that removed the soil and rock from upon us, or an internal combustion that thrust us out into our brilliance. We come from the pressure and heat, emerging as multifaceted, highly valuable, and incredibly strong precious stones. From the compression of life, we emerge as diamonds.

Be grateful for the pressure. 

The moments of life that feel as if they are crushing and burning us, are merely intensifying our shine. It is in those moments that our facets are being cut and our luster is being clarified. A woman who has not been challenged does not shine. A woman who has taken the pressure DAZZLES!

How about you? Can you take the pressure?
*http://science.howstuffworks.com/environmental/earth/geology/diamond1.htm

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Woman Enough - Don't Sell Yourself Short! Finding "The One"

The Greatest Gift


The greatest gift a woman can give herself is to take the risk, the adventure and the experience of walking independently in life for a least a little while. She should take the opportunity to show herself of what she is capable of.  This is a gift she will treasure in her life, and it will do her much good.

A Woman Enough knows that she has  many paths and opportunities before her in life.  She is an amazing and beautiful creature, full of love,  full of life, and full of the ability to to great things in life.  Her heart for others and for good are a shining beacon in this world.  She is brilliant, she sparkles, and she dazzles.

But....


There are often times when she will want to share those with someone else.  She will be venturing on a new path and a new experience...finding "the one".  The companion and confidant that can share the roads with her, be her traveling partner, and co-maker of dreams. That road can be scary and confusing. But, from one Woman Enough to another Woman Enough, this advice is offered:

The ONE Will:
  • Be passionate about you, not possessive over you.
  • Complete your feeling of love, but not you.  He will compliment the completeness of who you already are.
  • Court you, even after he has your heart.
  • Love you for who you were, who you are, and who you will become - not for who you could be. 
  • Not step in to fix things for you without asking, but instead support your foundations, allowing you to make the repairs on your own.
  • Know when your need to be heard is more important than his need to speak. 
  • Consider your feelings in the decisions he makes.
  • Stand up and protect you, yet not shelter to so that you don't experience the world.
  • Put you on a pedestal, yet hold the ladder steady for you when you need to climb down and be human and flawed - and he will love that about you.
  • Respect your boundaries.
  • Not prod your painful spots, but work to be the salve that helps them heal.  
  • Not try to change you.
  • Know when he needs to be your Knight,  when you need to be the one at the reigns calling the shots, and when you both need to be a team to reach the goal. 
  • Trust, cherish, desire and empower you.
  • Be committed to you and want to work through the tough times when they do arise - which should not be often.
  • Support you in your efforts and successes.
  • Comfort you in your falls. 
  • Encourage you to reach for your dreams, and not be jealous or intimidated when you reach them. 
  • Be your safe place where you can let your hopes, fears, desires, ideas,wishes, dreams, and frustrations be heard without fear of being judged. 

It takes a bit of time and effort to recognize all of these things in "the one".  Many of them take practice to hone and truly live out in a relationship.  But, if you don't see at least a seed, a glimmer, a spark from the beginning, step back and take a look. If they are not there at all or if they are not growing, they may never be what you need.  Don't place your hopes in them appearing "someday" and you being able to grow those seeds or ignite those sparks. They are inherent in the one for you - and in you if you are the one for them.

Relationships take work, but should never be a constant struggle or battle -  especially early on. Don't ever, EVER sell yourself short on what you are worthy of in a relationship.  You were beautifully and wonderfully made. The one will recognize the prize that you are.

One more thing....

He will always open the door for you.

Friday, June 8, 2012

The Hawk And The Song Bird

A huge and powerful hawk soared overhead with a treasure in his talons.  He landed on a light post to enjoy the fruits of his labor, squawking and calling with victory and delight.  He confidently and cockily surveyed his hunting grounds, looking proud of what he had conquered.  Little did he know that in his over-confidence, he overlooked what would be nothing less that a formidable opponent, and the interrupter of his meal.

From the south, in all her beauty and all her might flew a little yellow bellied song bird.  Knowing that her territory must remain safe for her nest, she ignored that the hawk was seven times her size with talons and a beak that could end her flight with one contact.  Tenaciously, she began an aerial campaign of diving, fluttering, singing, and badgering.  Even in the midst of the  hawks warning squawks and calls, she continued.  Circling, swooping, chirping - she dove and pecked until her opponent conceded.  The hawk in defeat, gathered his catch in his claws and flew off as the little song bird followed him ensuring that  he wouldn't return.

As women, we face this type of challenge often.  We are in positions where we must go toe to toe with an opponent that is bigger than us.  When looking at the pairings, by all logic and reason the larger opponent would win.  But, there is something in us as women that shatters this logic.  From deep inside us, we find the strength, the courage, and like the little bird, the tenacity to face the challenges.  We stay at it, not without fear, but with a will that outweighs the fear.  As the opponent retreats, we keep a watchful eye to ensure that at least for the moment, it does not return. We do it for ourselves, our families and our relationships.

In moments of doubt and self consciousness, look at those victories. Whatever they may have been, a relationship hurdle, an illness, a job stressor or inequity, a two year old's temper tantrum, our own inner wars - when we come out the other side still standing and knowing that we stand triumphant in result or simply triumphant in character, that is a victory. Remember and call on these for reassurance that  you can stand strong.

When we have gone up against the hawk armed with nothing but our song and our will, we are Woman Enough!